Just When ( Non-Lovely Turned Lovely)

Just when...

I'm at the end of my patience, and my rope, and the kids are December-tired, surly, and the house doesn't feel like Christmas at all

Just when...

peace is shattered with a sharp word and a broken Lego (it was an accident, I'm sure)

Just when...

I'm wondering about all this effort and if the heart is the wellspring why does the hard and ugly keep a steady flow...

Just when...

I want someone else's job today and I'm slinking to my bedroom for turkey-on-wheat alone because if I sit at the table with the children my very last string will snap and it won't be good or uplifting for anyone...

I peek past the corner and see three boys at the table, heads tipped in prayer, bowing past peanut butter and jelly and lifting soft, murmured words to the Lord Most High.

And I stand in the hall and I'm moved to tears because the Lord is here and He's so close and He hears the heartbeat and frayed prayer of one mama in one small house in one small corner of the very big world. Anything good here is Him. He meets our sin and flows over it and around it and through it.

And He lifts me out, us out, into His mercy and grace.

And it's really Christmas after all.

Oh Lord, I love you so. Thank you...